diariesofaretiredsadgirl.com

Just a blog from a girl who got tired of being sad all the d**** time so she figured it out.

It Takes Little Steps to Make Big Changes

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Looking back on it now, I honestly have no idea why I allowed myself to be sad for so long. I thought that I was a victim of the world and that everyone should feel bad for the trials and tribulations I had. When really, the biggest problem that I had was that I didn’t respect myself and my self esteem was TRASH. I was only a victim of the reality that I created for myself and I was doing absolutely nothing to change the pattern, the only thing I was doing was feeling sorry for myself. I wanted someone that was going to save me, love me and make all my problems go away. Silly goose, the only person who was capable of doing that was ME. A friend once told me, when you are crying in the shower, who is the one that makes you stand up and turn the water off? YOU TURN THE WATER OFF. I spent so much time letting my “daddy issues” define me, that I never put the time into defining myself in the ways that I need. Now, I have the greatest appreciation of my father that I never thought was possible, I even ask him for advice now. The only thing that is truly standing in the way of the future that you want is yourself. There is not a single human on this planet who is not going through something in their personal lives and odds are, the person has it way worse than you. Remember to be grateful in those moments.

A few months after I started college, I started working at a tanning salon and the owner is one of the greatest human beings on the planet. She even let me leave and come back on more than one occasion. She did everything she possibly could to get it through my thick skull that I was the key to my own happiness, I was just too set on the fact that being a sad bitch was my identity and the only way I would have an “edge” was if I stayed sad. She bought me a book by Louise Hay called “You Can Heal Yourself ” and begged me to read it but of course, I wasn’t ready to take it seriously till years later. I have to say, now that I’m happy, I feel like the baddest bitch on the planet and my edge is the fiercest that it has ever been. Anyways, back to the book. I will say, until you are absolutely ready to take your life and future into your own hands don’t read it, you have to wait for the perfect moment in order to believe in the juju. We are one positive thought away from changing every fiber in our being. We are giant balls of energy, both positive and negative. The more positive energy that we can produce internally, the less room there is for negative energy. I’m not going to spoil every detail of the book, but the gist idea is that when you are sitting there saying how much pain you are in and how terrible your life is, change your thought. Pain is temporary, breath in and breath out and fight the pain. Just see what happens. Changing your thoughts is the first step of changing your life.

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